Operational Transparency
System Status
Partial Outage
Last updated: April 12, 2026 · Updates approved by Mittens on a case-by-case basis
Components
Nap Infrastructure
Core sleep cycle processing & REM queue management
Operational
Hairball Processing Queue
Asynchronous output handling & load balancer integration
Degraded Performance
Purr API
Public-facing endpoints & resonance frequency services
Operational
Laser Dot Tracking System
Real-time dot position telemetry & pursuit analytics
Operational
Treat Dispensing Service
Scheduled treat delivery & reward state management
Operational
Active Incidents
INC-0042
Hairball Processing Queue: Degraded Performance
Mittens has been observed hissing at the load balancer since 14:22. The hissing appears to be
unprovoked. No configuration changes were made prior to the incident. Mittens does not require
a configuration change to initiate a hissing event. Engineering is monitoring. ETA: whenever.
Updated April 12, 2026 at 14:47
Incident History
INC-0041
Nap Infrastructure: Unplanned Outage (2h 14m)
Captain Floof was observed pressing the power button with her face at approximately 09:11.
The affected services were restored after Floof was relocated to the sunny windowsill
(northeast quadrant). Root cause: gravity. Mitigation: the button has been covered with
a Post-it note. Floof has been briefed. Floof did not retain the briefing.
March 20, 2026 · Resolved 11:25
INC-0040
Purr API: Incorrect Response Body (23m)
Byte walked across the Purr API configuration file. The resulting commit (aaaaaaaaaa) was
deployed to production without review. All API responses returned HTTP 200 with body
"aaaaaaaaaa" for 23 minutes. Rolled back successfully. Byte has not acknowledged this incident
and has not been asked to.
January 3, 2026 · Resolved 09:52
INC-0039
Laser Dot Tracking System: Full Outage (3h 58m)
Lord Whiskers III knocked the tracking server off the rack as part of routine QA procedures.
The server survived the fall and was documented as passing gravity testing. Services restored
after hardware was returned to the rack by someone who is not Lord Whiskers III.
October 7, 2025 · Resolved 13:44
INC-0038
Laser Dot Tracking System: Access Blocked (6h 12m)
Mittens declared the Laser Dot Tracking System an unauthorized surveillance threat and blocked
all inbound traffic at the radiator (our firewall). Investigation confirmed the laser dot had
not submitted the required access request. The dot's authorization status remains under review.
Service restored after Mittens was offered a treat and remained non-committal about it.
July 15, 2025 · Resolved 14:05
INC-0037
Nap Infrastructure: Maintenance Delay (4h 00m)
Dr. Purr-a-lot's nap cycle extended into a scheduled maintenance window, delaying all
infrastructure updates by four hours. The maintenance window had been on the shared calendar
since Q4 2024. Dr. Purr-a-lot does not check the shared calendar. All updates were applied
successfully once Dr. Purr-a-lot shifted 4 cm to the left.
April 2, 2025 · Resolved 11:30