Mittens has identified a critical vulnerability in the global tuna supply chain.
Attack vector: auction house.
Impact: critical.
Affected asset: one 276kg bluefin, Japan, Q1 2026.
Current status: in hooman hands. Allocated for hooman consumption.
This is the breach.
ihazpaws has conducted a full perimeter review. The slow blink authentication protocol held. No ihazpaws tuna reserves were affected. This time.
Mittens recommends immediate reclassification of all bluefin tuna as critical infrastructure. ihazpaws accepts no liability for supply chains that fail to comply. We have reviewed the situation. We have hissed. The record reflects this.
Patch your supply chain accordingly.